pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
