i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
She only spoke Russian, but she was so gorgeous it didn't matter
Oh. I think she ate all the cake and took our vodka...still gorgeous.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
You need to be on (or possibly create) the international emoji committee to address all of these glaring oversights
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
