Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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