I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
be right there i have to get my cape
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Randomize
