She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
