I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Randomize
