I think im going to throw up on grandma
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Randomize