If i come over, it means nothing
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize