i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
