I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
You basically told your boyfriend at the time you were going to shit in his hands.
And I meant every ounce of it.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
