btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
