Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Randomize
