So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I don't deserve a penis
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
You kicked my dad IN THE NUTS right when he walked in.
Sorry, man. Thought he was a cop.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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