We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
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