Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
