If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Night one million where I have madri gra beads around my neck and no justifiable reason for where they came from
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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