Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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