Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
Randomize