"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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