I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
Apparently I told the bartender to stop putting ice in my drink because it was taking up too much room
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
