No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
