speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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