please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
