we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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