Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small. http://tfl.nu/i072
  Replies (47) Good night (4338) Bad night (1068)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough. http://tfl.nu/4w8d
  Replies (11) Good night (1179) Bad night (3600)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (225): ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today http://tfl.nu/mtu3
  Replies (17) Good night (1229) Bad night (9426)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated. http://tfl.nu/okg6
  Replies (8) Good night (3304) Bad night (1368)
• Favorite

  (469): View more from Texas

  you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (469): you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator http://tfl.nu/bsby
  Replies (21) Good night (7349) Bad night (1694)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (201): oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay. http://tfl.nu/lkny
  Replies (24) Good night (2278) Bad night (3533)
• Favorite

  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (484): You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you. http://tfl.nu/o9a4
  Replies (3) Good night (1386) Bad night (3075)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (816): So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me. http://tfl.nu/bb44
  Replies (23) Good night (1561) Bad night (5390)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  there are ass prints on the hood of my car.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): there are ass prints on the hood of my car. http://tfl.nu/hwv7
  Replies (10) Good night (3117) Bad night (1070)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun. http://tfl.nu/afxx
  Replies (5) Good night (2264) Bad night (752)
• Favorite

  (708): View more from Illinois

  We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (708): We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance http://tfl.nu/osk3
  Replies (4) Good night (3252) Bad night (647)
• Favorite

  (760): View more from California

  I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (760): I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays. http://tfl.nu/jyu4
  Replies (4) Good night (747) Bad night (387)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (775): I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies http://tfl.nu/5tdh
  Replies (1) Good night (516) Bad night (552)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public. http://tfl.nu/y1be
  Replies (2) Good night (624) Bad night (278)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (425): Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie http://tfl.nu/bdxv
  Replies (2) Good night (553) Bad night (197)

Randomize