Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(352): View more from Florida

I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.

(904): View more from Florida

You stay classy.

(352): View more from Florida

The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.

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(301): View more from Maryland

is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?

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(601): View more from Mississippi

is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please

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(870): View more from Arkansas

you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys

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(479): View more from Arkansas

I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.

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(706): View more from Georgia

I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit

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(515): View more from Iowa

I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.

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