oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Seriously. If I'd known all it took was a 29 year old UPS guy to make me feel THIS SEXY, I'd have been fucking them for 30 years.
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.