billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
Randomize
