: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
Randomize
