I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
please don't text me until you can spell three letter words again.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
My vagina is very pro this idea
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