I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
STOP PUTTING BUTTER ON MY FUCKING CAT
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