he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
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She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
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I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
I remember is someone saying "I smell weed" and then having a room full of sober high school kids look at me.
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