Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
