Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
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