You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Randomize
