we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Randomize