Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
My New Years Resolution was to get a girl I dont know pregnant. 8 months later I can check that off the list..
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
