That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Just found a quarter that has been stuck to my boob since at least last night.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
