He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Randomize
