No awkward lesbian experiences without me
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
The convent might be a nice break from real life
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
