I cockslap morals
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
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