oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I caught him trying to shit in her bed. I asked him why he was doing it and he said "because it's wrong."
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
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