sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
