Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
