Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Randomize
