Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
How do people deal with hangovers? I literally want to eat my own face.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
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