I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
You left your phone here
Wait...
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