Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Randomize
