Apparently you make a good broom.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
my dad just said 'either you're lying about your plans tonight or you kids are really lame nowadays'. maybe we should nix the singles saturday slumber party and go to a bar.
You texted the wrong number but that's probably the best call you'll ever make.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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