I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
He said he forgot to take his shoes off, and that he was a bad boy because he was walking on the carpet. Then he sang. Then he shouted "I'M STILL FORGETTING."
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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