I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
