worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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