I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
I love how my cats smell like pot.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Did I hit my head yesterday? I have a bump on the back of it. Also I just want you to know that I don't blame you for me taking my bikini top off. If I want to be shirtless no man or woman on this earth can stop me.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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