He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize