I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he thought i was a dude.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
Was I asleep on the ride home?
Yea, then when I tried to hold your head up on a turn, you round house punched me in the face.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
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